Thursday, September 12, 2013

In this moment, I have it all.

Meet Florida's most adorable gator

I'm sitting at a cafe/kids' jungle gym as I write.

It goes without saying this is pretty much what I always imagined "stay at home mom life" to be.

Today: I prepared breakfast and cleaned while Ali watched Word World. Then after lunch there was every mother's savior: Nap time, where I cooked dinner as well as had a much needed phone call with the bestie about potty training and preschool. Post nap we headed to the library for an afternoon of story time and arts/crafts. And because I know my child has insane energy to burn, I found out about Family Night at an indoor jungle gym, Monkey Bizznizz. $5 to play from 5 pm til close.

We've been here two hours and I don't see any signs of Ali's energy running out. This place is great and what a fantastic idea! Parents get to have coffee/snacks and stare at their phone without whining in the background. Meanwhile, kids tumble, slide, jump, climb and do everything but stare at a screen for hours. Best $5 ever spent! 

Earlier this week a friend posted an article on Facebook about the concept of 'having it all' and how society has brainwashed women into thinking that we must have it all while also warping our definition of what it means. It got me thinking about the fact that I left a pretty promising career to be doing this. No pay, managing finances to live/save off one income, not to mention diaper duty (soon to be potty training duty, which Ali seems more ready for than I am!), booboo kissing, cheering him on to climb higher or celebrating his little victories.

Some days its really exhausting and everyday is harder than a day at a 'real job'. Yesterday I found Spider-Man stickers on the bum of my sweatpants (who knows how many ppl I met or stores I went to where no one thought to tell me!) and today I had to smudge finger-paint off my new KS purse (thank god for washable paint). Both those instances made me smile. It meant my son was exploring and growing; and most importantly I was there to be a part of it. I know people without kids don't get it, they and sometimes even we parents see children as a hindrance from 'living it up' or 'having it all'. But, I still remember not too long ago (1.5 months to be exact) sitting behind a desk staring at my kid's pictures on my phone as I ate lunch feeling depressed about missing out on his childhood. I had many things then, but I felt I didn't 'have it all'.  

I'm not knocking down working moms, I was one for 2.5 years. I have tremendous respect for women who continue to succeed with a career and duties of motherhood. And I know there are days you feel like everything is balancing just right and days where nothing is. I made a decision to leave work and spend time with my toddler, because I realized that for me, doing both simultaneously did not make me happy. And right now, that's a decision I'm SO glad I made. Tomorrow my thoughts may change or maybe I won't have the opportunity and choice not to work, so today I'm swimming in SAHM's blissful pool. This is what I define as a job I wouldn't trade for anything in the world. I truly love the feeling that I'm not missing a single moment of watching him grow up; tantrums,tears and all.

So now for your viewing pleasure, the memories we made this week:
Favorite exhibit at Glazer's Childrens Museum
Cutest cashier Publix ever saw!

Sliding down the big boy jungle gym
Weekly Wednesday morning balloon and face painting at the mall
Tough guy coming through!

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